too much - too little: frustration

I sometimes allow the feeling within and as me that I need to do more than others for the same or similar task. It's as if I needed to compensate for a lack, a deficiency, an inadequacy. In this I'm accepting and allowing that I make such an effort within getting useful reading material or practice sheets etc, things that in the end are not valued, in fact are not even necessary. It turns out that the expectations weren't there, the support wasn't 'inherently' welcome. There I was preparing for lessons, for courses, for perceived needs that I thought I needed to address - but in actuality it was sometimes even seen as annoying and bothersome, especially with people who just wanted to sit the time out and get it over with somehow. I was trying to support unemployed people who didn't want to see their own responsibility or the chance of being supported. Or the starting point of minimalism in teenagers saying 'passt scho' (= it suffices/it's sufficient) = I don't need to really go into it more than I am = I don't want to actually understand it. It remains superficial.

So, on the one hand I tend to overdue 'support' for my own reasons of 'feeling inadequate' - which I am addressing within a TL or two (or maybe more!) in the current mc I'm doing. On the other hand there is this extreme of some of the guys not even taking advantage of a minimum of what could be achieved in the time spent together. And some are trying to understand, are working through the lessons we do together and it just doesn't stick, they apply the knowledge in the exercises and seem to forget everything again in a test situation. They're trying to learn it as 'apart from themselves', in separation. And then it's just there floating around in their heads without context obviously. And there is only 'so much' of context that is available to embed the subject matter. Like within a computer game setting... only.

One thing I found that was prominent though with most kids was the circumstance that they didn't completely read what the exercise was about, what is wanted of them. They skip the task description and pick out only one or the other word and then guess what they are to do. This has been something I keep addressing and pointing out, but, I don't know, they just forget. They're not taking themselves seriously enough to actually read the instructions.

Well, so much for today. Got that off my mind for now.